Categories
Faith Over Achieving Personal Growth

Striving for Perfection At Work Or In Your Art Work

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Your best is all you have and it is enough!

Updated: Aug 24 by Patsy Dale

Hello, I wanted to chime in about my thoughts on “Perfection At Work” topic. No one is perfect and as a woman of faith to me that is as factual as the sun coming up each day. What I find in its place, the efforts to be perfect and perfect in our work is that if we simply strive for perfection in our ethics, morality, and faith, we are more likely to succeed in whatever that may mean to us.

I hear all the time that a boss and their boss and the corporate uppers expect nothing short of perfection, therefore we are overworked with loss of love for our positions. When we own a business it’s a different story, we must do everything we can to keep running, even if on empty. Stress, frustration, and fear are not worthy of our lives, we must shine in our level of ethical expectations not only from ourselves but those that we work with and most importantly for the values we hold dear.

I get that life is complicated, “nothing is perfect” but we must not settle and if we do, then make it for something that is of some interest to us and that we find a source of personal wellbeing in what we do for our income. Passion is not a luxury it’s a choice, find your passion and work it into your job or on the side until you are at the point of being able to move on from your current job (if that is the case).

Perfection is unrealistic but striving for it is not. Give yourself permission to fail and succeed within your own limitations. Make no excuses as we can only do our best and nothing more, if your best gets the job well done then you have reached a level of personal best.

I use this mindset while working on my art and, if you think that it helps, well it rarely does. Creatives feel the need for perfection more deeply I believe, it’s visceral and innate within us as creators of our versions of art. As a painter and writer, there is no way I expect perfection, but I do expect that I will be honest and true to my vision; even if I’m not sure what that is while creating and usually not until done or as close to it as I can get and still feel a sense of completion.

Leave “perfection” to God or your higher power and once again I’ll say, “your best is all you have, so put your best forward every time”.

~ Yours Truly, Patsy Dale

Categories
Change Hope Love Positivity

Where Is The Positivity?

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We Are What We Speak, Where is the Positivity?

Welcome back and thanks for being here to read my post today! I wanted to share that recently I saw a post on my FB feed, and it was a simple topic about the price of gas right now, but it was filled with negativity and President bashing over their ideas of why gas is $2.90 a gallon. (This is NOT political content.) My first instinctual thought was, “Gosh, this is so negative, why aren’t they posting that they are grateful it’s not $4 or $5 a gallon. I replied as such and a comment stated, “just wait, it’s coming”. WOW, people? Today, another post, different topic came over my feed and it stated the following: “My problem is…I expect “Me” out of people”.

The World Needs Your Light!

This thought, hit me like a ton of bricks and it was then very clear, that “is” my problem, could it be yours too?

Look, we all have opinions, ideas, frustrations, outlooks, reasons, hopes, and dreams (yikes) just trying to cover my bases for a broad readership. What we do not have is enough POSITIVE outlooks, and that my friends, is so very sad.

If you expect YOU out of the behavior of others, it is unrealistic thinking, I have been thinking unrealistically and am not afraid to admit it. What I can tout, is that because I am not considered the following, I feel as if my viewpoint is more flexible and yes, reasonable. Tough if you do not like it.

I am not: narrow-minded, racist, hard-hearted (for the most part, only about super personal issues), unempathetic, dishonest, narcissistic, over-political in my views, Pollyanna, unforgiving, or irrational. There is more, but I do not want to tout too harshly.

Our world is about to implode and then explode all over God’s universe that was created for our viewing pleasure, we as a historic group of well-wishers and assholes speak the worst ugliness out into the cosmos and expect what back exactly, results, accolades? Are you kidding me, we deserve what we have coming to us, so, who are you, a hopeful and positive or a defeatist with an angry right brain and a self-absorbed left brain? STOP, stop it now…what are you thinking, bitching, and moaning will do for you, whining and complaining all the time about what you cannot control in the big scheme of things? Your thoughts and ideas matter, but what if you conveyed them more gently and steadfastly, what if you started with a positive on the flip side or a compliment or even, God forbid, a sharing of what you are grateful for.

If the latter were the case, our relationships both personal, work, and politics would be on a much more supported foundation of gratitude and hopefulness. Why is this so hard for people to realize?

Here is what I hear:

“I suck at this, why do I bother.”

“I don’t want help, it’s not my way.”

“I know that I am right so nothing else matters, you don’t matter.”

“You are wrong, that will “never” work.”

“I am allowed my opinion so don’t judge me.”

“I wish we could just all get along.”

“Why is it so hard for us to come together?”

All these statements are valid, but ask yourselves, how do you speak those thoughts, your tone of voice, your ability to be open to another thought process, your empathy for others and their circumstances. Are you so apathetic and dogged in your way that you forget the world is made up of millions upon millions of individuals like you that want to be heard about the same subject, but not lambasted because of the way they think them or their beliefs?

Instead of hate, there is love and empathy. Instead of retribution, there is forgiveness. Instead of stupidity and double standards, we take a moment and consider what our fellow person must be going through. You never know what goes on in someone’s mind, or behind closed doors. Did you lose a loved one and not share, then how do we know why you are sad? Did you lose your job and are uncertain about your obligations and that put you in a defensive and brash mood? Get it off your chest with someone you trust that has a positive outlook to share. The fact is people, we do not know anything except what we have been groomed to believe by our families, the news, social media.

STOP, take a second, third, or even fourth look at a situation, and put yourselves in the shoes of others as it were. BE KIND, be generous of spirit, find a little beauty and hopefulness in a bad situation. STOP, listen, open your ears, the world is crying for LOVE, healing, compassion. STOP, bitching about the little things, lift your words higher, lift your neighbor with kindness, lift yourself to a level of hope and a grateful expectation that your positivity will lend a breeze of light, to someone who needs a miracle right now. STOP the HATE. Be respectful and if you cannot, step away and move on.

Respect the ideas of others, you will not be wrong in that. Remember your tone of voice matters, you are in no position to judge anyone, lest ye be judged by who does matter. Set your expectations realistically when it comes the opinions of others from yours.

Stop, look, listen, be hopeful and grateful, respectful, and kind and most of all be generous of your beautiful spirit because you are beautiful in your special way.

Yours truly, Patsy

Categories
Change Fears Featured Friends Hope Inspiration Love Moving On Personal Growth Posts Social

Fragile State Letter

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The below Letter in “bold” from November 6, 2008, was inspired by my life circumstances at the time, I wanted to share a preamble first so that you might get to know me better.

The history for the Fragile State Letter; A broken engagement, moving from home on a golf course to a rental in a not so nice area of my city, as it was all I could afford with no job. Although I had outstanding credit and a great resume, my landlord said he had a good feeling about me. I lived in my little “ghetto” condo for 10 long years; carrying my 9 mil from room to room. Don’t misunderstand my intent, I was a Caucasian female in my middle 40’s who moved into a predominantly black area of town that was considered a high crime and low income near the city jail, off the intersection of hardship & violent crime. My front door faced a busy road and it was like living in a much larger city. Police helicopters with big spotlights always searching for a “runner”, sirens whooshing by all hours of the night. Getaway drivers crashing through the divider wall from the street sidewalk to my parking lot. Most days that area made the news; “Body found or drug bust, and on and on.

I cannot tell my story of this time in my life without Hope, she and I endured a discovery of friendship in the harshest of circumstances, as we both were fighting to survive our lives. What I learned from that relationship then, and more importantly several years later, as I was able to try to walk a few miles in those white shoes of mine only to be resized and polished in black by Hope’s candor and loving efforts to allow me a walk-in hers and the realities that came with Hopes life. I am forever grateful for our friendship.

Acceptance was key for my mental health and being open to my situation. I did make some connections in the community and had my back covered by the guys in the corner unit, a few cousins renting the unit from a friend’s aunt. Younger men of color with their well cared for tricked out Grand National and an import as if it was used in Tokyo drifting. Sitting on the enjoying the comforts of their preferred social activities. I felt I had a safety net with those guys and will forever be grateful for the community and kindness they showed me. I grew from those and other interactions which helped me to better understand if just for a micro-fraction of time, what it was like being the minority in that neighborhood. The shoe for another moment of time was on the other foot. I thank God for the eye-opening, soul-testing time that was for me.

Admittedly, I found myself making a little mansion inside this 780sft run down privately owned condo. I used what little I had brought and using my creative powers, I really did make a lovely little home. Eventually, friends and other visitors would tell me, “wow, you would never know you live in this part of town by looking at your home inside”.

As I mourned the loss of a love that I had thought was “the one”, I realized this was a time in my life where I needed to start a journey of self-discovery, self-worthiness and, self-love. I deserved to love myself without the shame of my mistakes, past and present, and at the very least trust myself as I could not trust others due to the circumstances of what had happened in my relationship.

In retrospect, that 10 year period could have broken me and turned me into a completely different woman, my life could have gone horribly wrong but my biggest journey was my walk of faith, and there’s my miracle and my miracle life. Through reconnecting with some of my more memorable past, more recent friendships, and most of all with my faith; I found my way back to me in a more profound and kind way.

All of this certainly made it easier to deal with the loss of my beloved Daddy and the strength to become my brother’s lifeline after his whole world crashed down when the love of his life died suddenly. The loss of my 2nd to God role model and becoming an addict’s caregiver and sister for the first time in our lives was the next stage in my life, oh yes and I started college and graduated Summa Cum Laude.

My life those 10 years was a “Fragile State” of affairs. Through it all, when I was hungry and afraid, fearful more like it, feeling alone in the world, a miracle happened. An international collective of feline families all gathered on an open forum for cat lovers came into my life in the most brilliant of ways.

We posted snaps of our fur babies and shared the joys and sorrows of pet ownership and in a beautiful turn of events, I found a family of many nations. One local to my state reached out to listen by using Yahoo messenger and then shared it with our clique and then the most beautiful thing began to happen…As I was bankrupting, feeding my pets before myself, giving up the one thing I had always had control over; my finances, this community started sending/shipping cat food, litter, Euro’s, Dollars, and so much more, packages and envelopes from several countries and in those parcels was the love of strangers, like-minded, but strangers. Showing love and literally giving support in every way. I will never be as touched and profoundly grateful as then.


FRAGILE STATE, a letter of gratitude to a community of angels by Patsy Dale


We are in a fragile state and need each other to persevere, I am thankful for my many blessings regardless of my current circumstances.
There is a big bright, beautiful world out there and it needs our attention. A “whole” people together, to bring it all together; not just our nation but all nations. Times are horrific and I am a living testimony to what times are doing to individuals and their community, family, and friends!

It’s as simple as reaching out and stating your case to someone who will listen. Be honest and accountable for your situation and you may be SURPRISED at the results.

As I write this note to the world on 11/6/08, there are people just like me, in Germany, Italy, Spain, Canada, and Japan, and right here in the US that are reaching out to me in my time of need. This is truly a community of loving people. A website I am a member of simply because I am a cat family. “ASTOUNDING”, that there is love and random acts of kindness going on out there. Well, I finally see why the saying goes: “When you help someone with no expectations and unconditionally, it will come back to you many times over”.

IT’S TRUE. Thank you my loving friends at Picato. You are currently my angels from above and my Lord’s blessings. We were living a dream of one helping one, helping everyone.

I am working hard to change my circumstances and to build a little website design and brand marketing business for the “at home businesses” of the world, they too need an affordable way to be heard and discovered.

It’s the little things in life that create the foundation on which we ALL STAND TOGETHER. Thanks for letting me stand on my proud yet unstable soapbox for today.

God Bless all of you who supported my journey, my online messages of love and forgiveness, perseverance, dignity, unity, and hope.

~ Yours truly, Patsy Dale

Categories
Covid Related Faith Hope Posts

Party of “ONE” for COVID Pandemic?

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For those of us that have no partner or spouse, no kids, no roommates, no one residing with us, we get double punched!

Other than actually losing a loved one, the second hardest part of this whole pandemic is when you lose someone whether it is due to COVID-19 or not, we must deal with it on our own, alone. No hugs, no in-house consoling, no late-night crying knowing you will receive the TLC you deserve, on top of that; the resounding shared crappiness of this nightmare, no one coming over to keep you from getting hip-high into your grief or helping to keep you eating and hydrated. Just hanging out, just being there.

When my sister passed away on October 10th, 2020, I was blessed to have my lifelong “Wendy” take the journey to South Florida with me. She heard and called me up and said, “I may not have been fond of how she treated you but because I love you and you never gave up on her, I don’t want you to be alone”. This was a really big deal and out of her comfort zone; and mine, we are both rather reclusive women even before COVID. I am so very grateful for her and for putting up with me being Miss Independent and not letting her help me with much. I had to ask her forgiveness and apologize to her at least twice.

I got home and have been alone in my grief ever since, and if you can imagine “re-grieving” for my brother (2016) and both my parents (2006 & 2008, (too young)) because my sister was my last living immediate family. I feel like I have a form of what I know to be PTSD in a way. This is a time for faith! Faith in God, for me. If I feel the emptiness the way I do, then I know others out there; known and unknown are feeling the same way! As a pragmatic person who is also empathic, my heart hurts more for others more than for myself. Perhaps not so much on those few and far between dark days that I tend to have whether before the pandemic or during. We all get them, don’t say you don’t.

All I can do is pray for all of you that lost a loved one this last year and to date because it is awful to not be surrounded by friends, I would say family but, well you know …

Be strong and rely on your courage and it’s okay to cry and fall apart. Do not stay there very long in that place of sorrow, pray to whomever your higher power is, and truly believe and know that you are loved and not alone. My faith in God helps me with this every day. Phone calls help from loved ones, I know they helped me, remember everyone is going through something extraordinary because of this pandemic. Remember “video chatting” is a big benefit right now. Use and have fun with it; have girls’ night, or art project, watch a movie or sitcom together, I know I don’t do vid chats but I would if it was offered to me. So in the mix of things your feeling remember to be kind and generous with your patients and stay hopeful, even if you are really are alone like me; if I can do it you can do it, I promise.

~ Your Truly, Patsy Dale

Categories
Foodism

Sirloin Meatloaf Plate & Roasted Beets

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Here, I have…get ready now! Sirloin meatloaf, (if you feel the need to have the recipe, then you will have to subscribe and request it, incentive kids!). Chunky red bliss mash and shredded asiago cheese. Then, roasted brussels with sweet potatoes and sweet onion. Finally, the most amazing fennel roasted beets. It’s not a 4th BBQ but believe me, we did not miss it all with this meal.

This dish was one of my all-time favs! My gal Shelley came to see me for two weeks after not seeing one another for 30 years. I felt one way to seal the deal of sisterly and mischievous love was to be my very best me and do what I was born to do, “COOK”. Regardless what I was going through at the time, there was a super sweet angel going to be on my doorstep soon. What a grand time we had for the 4th of July, a week of monsoons and champagne. We even managed to tweak out a drunken 2am pink painting too.

Categories
Foodism

Crispy Salmon Plate

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Here, I have pan roasted Salmon with crispy skin seasoned with lemon pepper and garlic seasoning. The sauce is a homemade creamy lemon pepper vinaigrette using Greek yogurt, olive oil and a touch of buttermilk. (I told you my flavors are unique), super unctuous. Alongside, simple chopped garden veggies no seasoned because the sauce is meant to share w/ the veggies.

Look folks, I make it up as I go along…While I shop in store or online these days, I virtually taste and see what my ingredients might be. I can almost tasted it so I tend to find near perfection in my choices of seasoning and other ingredients. The sad thing is, I rarely write my creations down so it’s never the exact flavor as the previous version. A great many frustrated friends over the years begged me to create a recipe, sorry kids…I’ll be sure to work on that!

I did create a “recipe” for the sauce/dressing, leave a comment or use the contact form on About page and I can send it to you! Better yet, “Subscribe” why don’t you.

Categories
Foodism

Tasty Quinoa Plate

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Here, I have created a chopped salad out of Tabbouleh with added items like green onion, cilantro, and radishes. Medium steamed egg and a kale and quinoa patty with homemade parmesan & three pepper mayo using olive oil to add the creamy texture.

I prepare, purchase and display my food as if it were art, to me this process is very much an art in its own right. When I went to Germany in 2011, I loved the simplicity of the plates that were put in front of me by my hosts. A beautiful grouping (not always this colorful) but itemized and I liked that because I felt as if my choices on the plate were then endless!

Categories
Writings

The Fighting Path

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©January 1, 2008, by Patsy Dale Henson

It is a new day, a NEW PATH to consider.  Some of us find ourselves in a rendering; incomplete, not moving in any direction.  Although renderings are certainly a form of art and beautiful, my view is that they are the beginning thoughts in the process.  So here I am at my age, still in the beginning thoughts of my life’s stages.  This does not sit well with me, so I have a plan, a life plan, a “big fat” commitment to only two, God and myself.  I will not fight the path any longer. I will walk only where I am of a clear conscience to do so and this will be my guiding light of the “fighting path” and the Lord will lead me.

Life’s path is uneasy, unfair, ineffective, unruly, and simply hard.  The promise is that we will have what we need when we need it most if only we believe.  I have always believed, but never walked the path that God set for me.  We are not omnipotent; we cannot always tell his path from one to the other, but we do know right from wrong. That feeling you get inside when you most certainly know that you are about to make the wrong choice for your right reasons or the right choice for the wrong reasons. Can you see my meaning, not easy this life; our gift from God, our precious mostly wasted, priceless gift.

We falter, and forget, we curse and gossip, we are not perfection, although that is what we aspire to be.  Plain and simply put, there is only “one” perfection and HE loves each of us as we should love him, without question and in his perfection.

~ Yours Truly, Patsy Dale


Categories
Art Featured Inspiration Moving On Posts

Digital Art, Yes, It’s Art!

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First, I want to share with you that I have been drawing and creating some kind art since I was about 11 yrs old. Sketching things I see and copying my version of something in a book or from a deck of cards. I remember my grandmother had a deck of cards with a beautiful Toucan bird on them, and such vivid colors. My mother became frustrated with me for some reason, (often there was not a real reason, that was how she was with me), and she gave me the deck and said, “Patsy Dale, go in your room and draw this bird or do something in your room for a while, now go!” Of course I will be honest and say she never just asked, she would screamed it.

So from that day forward I started sketching and drawing along with my poetry and other writings that sprang from being mostly raised in my bedroom. I still have everything that I have ever written that was not lost in my myriad of moves and even homelessness as a young woman out in the world with no back up.

There won’t be any of my youthful drawings here unless I can find the one or two that I have hidden away somewhere. What you will find here first are my expressive creations in digital format. When I left a very broken long term relationship in 2006 most of the work starts there to now. There are a few unrefined drawings and paintings from older primitive applications that I may brave to share, if only to give background to a post or a writing.

The program I used gave me full license to choose my mediums, and my substrates (yes I know the term may be ill used as it is a scientific term) but to me, my paper, canvas, metal, glass, plastic and fabrics became living things for the paint and processes to live on as I deemed. The tools were plenty in the choice the application gave me. brushes, rollers, palette knives, air brush, gloop pens, stencils, pencil, markers and so much more.

So if you think that “digital” art is not a true form of artistic expression, you would be wrong! These paintings took me from days to weeks to months and yes, even a few over a year to bring to conclusion well enough that I could say, “it’s done”.

Always keeping faith, Patsy Dale

Categories
Writings

Eggshells

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© Written September 15, 1998 by Patsy Dale Henson

When I began to walk on eggshells every time that you came in the door, I knew that we had run out of the first impression. 

As I would struggle through my thoughts of you, instead of with the ease of first love, I knew it was time to clearly see the truth of the moment. 

You are about to become what once was, no longer to be my future.  I am about to become what I have feared the most, your untruthful story of blame or the one that got away because I had to run.

If I am ever going to walk on eggshells again, it will be in my garden where the beautiful flowers bloom.

~ Yours Truly, Patsy Dale